lebe03 Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Southern Police Those Southerners have a way with words! These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos: 1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through." 2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while." 3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." (My Favorite) 4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." 5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you." (LOVE IT) 6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?" 7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?" 8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket." 9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?" 10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop." 11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven." 12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC." ( National Crime Information Center ) 13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?" 14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can." 15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail." AND THE WINNER IS.... 16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Biggles Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 :doglaugh:Love 'em all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
She-Who-Walks-Sitka-Su Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Haha! I liked #12 & #10! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Brilliant!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistyrayn Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 the usual saying.... "ONLY IN AMERICA" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tripled Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 last one is the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dunc Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Lovin 16 lmao Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow-Kodah-Drako Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 :doglaugh:thats brill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Removed #5 Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 This is a little longer than that, which I enjoyed! but ... A Texas DPS (Department of Public Safety) Trooper pulled over this car for speeding. Walks up to the driver, who turns out to be a good looking young lady. She says "And I suppose you're going to give me an invitation to the DPS ball, huh?" He says "Ma'am, Troopers don't have balls." and turned around and left! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taiya Blue and Miko too Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 :lolman: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valkyries Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xLOBOx Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marley & Lumikkis Mummy Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 :doglaugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted August 24, 2011 Report Share Posted August 24, 2011 Thanx for making me LAFF out loud Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sutsibe Posted August 25, 2011 Report Share Posted August 25, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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