Dave Posted August 25, 2011 Report Share Posted August 25, 2011 Man Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally the guys' side of the story. We always hear the rules From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE! 1. Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it your self. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying , but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, football, cars or golf. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted August 25, 2011 Report Share Posted August 25, 2011 Absolutley fantastic! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted August 25, 2011 Report Share Posted August 25, 2011 Seen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormchaser09 Posted August 25, 2011 Report Share Posted August 25, 2011 some of that does actually make sense to us women Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jules dief taz tor Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 omg now i understand . thankyou Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elyse Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 LOL - so that's what goes on in a male's brain? Quite simple minds, eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 LOL - so that's what goes on in a male's brain? Quite simple minds, eh? exactly! so women should confuse us with your witchcraft! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indigo & Oisin Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 As for the toilet seat part, PUT IT DOWN!!!!!! it's gross having to touch the underneath of the toilet seat to put it bac down again. and it IS possible for men to use the loo with the seat down, you lot can aim can't you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elyse Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 As for the toilet seat part, PUT IT DOWN!!!!!! it's gross having to touch the underneath of the toilet seat to put it bac down again. and it IS possible for men to use the loo with the seat down, you lot can aim can't you? Apparently they can; because they like to write messages in the snow. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 As for the toilet seat part, PUT IT DOWN!!!!!! it's gross having to touch the underneath of the toilet seat to put it bac down again. and it IS possible for men to use the loo with the seat down, you lot can aim can't you? we have to touch the underneath part to put it up! you just have to touch the top to put it down! you just ruined your own argument! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indigo & Oisin Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 Apparently they can; because they like to write messages in the snow. LOL exactly! They can do that but they seem incapable of aiming into a big toilet bowl when the seat is down, the seat is only a few inches wider than the rim of the loo!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indigo & Oisin Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 we have to touch the underneath part to put it up! you just have to touch the top to put it down! you just ruined your own argument! that is only true if you let the loo slam down on it's own, which in my experience leads to broken seats and sometimes a broken loo. to make the seat go back down without it slamming, you have to touch the underneath!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 exactly! They can do that but they seem incapable of aiming into a big toilet bowl when the seat is down, the seat is only a few inches wider than the rim of the loo!!! backsplash............ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indigo & Oisin Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 backsplash............ HOW!!!???? if anything the seat will protect you from that!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sutsibe Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 LOL - so that's what goes on in a male's brain? Quite simple minds, eh? Simple minds, indeed! Amazing, actually, how much that list reminded me of my dogs... As regards the toilet seat - DOWN - and the LID too! Hate having dogs and cats drink out of the toilet (and having cats fall in!)!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 Simple minds, indeed! Amazing, actually, how much that list reminded me of my dogs... As regards the toilet seat - DOWN - and the LID too! Hate having dogs and cats drink out of the toilet (and having cats fall in!)!!! poor cats! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graeme&thepack Posted August 27, 2011 Report Share Posted August 27, 2011 Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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