Mia-Blue Posted August 5, 2013 Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 So its feedback day tomorrow for Brookes ASD assessment.....God I feel sick and have horrendous butterflies, I can't see me getting much sleep tonight!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted August 5, 2013 Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 Thanks Andy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 5, 2013 Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 Good luck for tomorrow, I hope you get the answers you need. Worrying about your kid is the worst, all you want is to make it better, ( worn the T-shirt on that one to a holey grey mess !) Just remember no matter what they say she has one huge advantage over other kids......... YOU ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 Good luck for tomorrow, I hope you get the answers you need. Worrying about your kid is the worst, all you want is to make it better, ( worn the T-shirt on that one to a holey grey mess !) Just remember no matter what they say she has one huge advantage over other kids......... YOU ! And then the tears came xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BingBlaze n Skyla Posted August 5, 2013 Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 Big hugs hun , sure it'll all be fine but good luck anyway x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 5, 2013 Report Share Posted August 5, 2013 And then the tears came xx No No No, no tears now, Brooke`s 13 now ? I don't want to scare you BUT ..... At 13 my girl came home and said she wasn't going to be friends with a classmate anymore, I asked why (stupid stupid stupid !) She told me quite bluntly that she was a " bit of a tramp" becouse " she gave some boy, NOT her boyfriend a blowjob in the park" I nearly fell off my chair ! At 16 she's had her belly pierced and is one of only two girls in her circle able to still wear white to get married. At 18 she plans to get a tattoo, And you thought the assessment was something to worry about Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goingsolo Posted August 6, 2013 Report Share Posted August 6, 2013 Thinking of you x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 6, 2013 No No No, no tears now, Brooke`s 13 now ? I don't want to scare you BUT ..... At 13 my girl came home and said she wasn't going to be friends with a classmate anymore, I asked why (stupid stupid stupid !) She told me quite bluntly that she was a " bit of a tramp" becouse " she gave some boy, NOT her boyfriend a blowjob in the park" I nearly fell off my chair ! At 16 she's had her belly pierced and is one of only two girls in her circle able to still wear white to get married. At 18 she plans to get a tattoo, And you thought the assessment was something to worry about They weren't worried tears, but emotional ones.......its been a tough few weeks......not only have we had the assessment, Abbie my 8 year old had an endoscopy last week which confirmed her diagnosis of Coeliac Disease and I started a new job! Yes Brooke is 13, and rather scarily we have had the my friend gave a boy a blow job situation recently too........what is that all about at 13? Brooke has also recently mentioned belly button piercing Recently she has struggled in friendship groups as when asked......does this suit me, or am I fat, Brooke is honest with her answers! Not what other 13 year olds want to hear! Just this weekend in london she loudly told me the child in front was really annoying her, I just avoided eye contact with his mother......life is never dull! I'm just really nervous about the results, on one hand I want to know the reason behind her behaviour, this I should get in a diagnosis .......but then again I want them to say there is nothing wrong with her so she can come through this and have a normal life.......but if they say there is nothing wrong then her behaviour must be my fault........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 6, 2013 Report Share Posted August 6, 2013 Regardless of what they say she will have a normal life, aspergers won't stop that, she will find friends who will appreciate her honesty. As for her comment in london, WAS the boy annoying ? If he was then she should make it clear his behaviour isn't acceptable. ( when my kids were little, if we were polite and held a door for someone and didn't get a thank you we would say a very loud ` your welcome ` it's a polite way of telling someone there a rude git. As for the whole BJ thing, I don't know but it scares the he'll out of me, kids are doing more at a much younger age, at 13 I knew what it was but wouldn't have dreamt of doing it !. If you decide to let her go ahead and get a belly ring, I can recommend a really good place in Camden where I took my girl, strict on ages, hygiene etc, and really good at explaining everything. Still, you've got a while to make that decision. Poor Abbie, that's hard for such a little one, at least if you know you can start to deal with it (kirsty has IBS, much fun during GCSEs !) hopefully you will find the right and wrong foods for her fairly quickly. So what's the new job ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah Posted August 6, 2013 Report Share Posted August 6, 2013 Thinking of you today x x Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 6, 2013 Regardless of what they say she will have a normal life, aspergers won't stop that, she will find friends who will appreciate her honesty. As for her comment in london, WAS the boy annoying ? If he was then she should make it clear his behaviour isn't acceptable. ( when my kids were little, if we were polite and held a door for someone and didn't get a thank you we would say a very loud ` your welcome ` it's a polite way of telling someone there a rude git. As for the whole BJ thing, I don't know but it scares the he'll out of me, kids are doing more at a much younger age, at 13 I knew what it was but wouldn't have dreamt of doing it !. If you decide to let her go ahead and get a belly ring, I can recommend a really good place in Camden where I took my girl, strict on ages, hygiene etc, and really good at explaining everything. Still, you've got a while to make that decision. Poor Abbie, that's hard for such a little one, at least if you know you can start to deal with it (kirsty has IBS, much fun during GCSEs !) hopefully you will find the right and wrong foods for her fairly quickly. So what's the new job ? The boy wasn't doing anything wrong, he was just there! We were in a museum and it was quite busy and he touched her a few times......need I say more? To be honest she did quite well throughout the day and was given lots of praise for it I'm in no rush with the belly piercing and hope she goes off the idea before she reaches 16! Yes things are tough for Abbie, they originally thought she had ibs....she is busy trying lots of gluten free food, at the moment she is ok with the changes as sge knows her tummy will soon be better, I just hope the positive attitude continues once she realises the extent of the foods she can no longer have! My new job......I'm a Community Care Officer....which means I work with Social Workers, I'm based in family placement unit and support family and friends carers. I feel very lucky to have secured such a fantastic post I'm only in my 3rd week, but my new manager couldn't be more understanding with what I have going on with the girls at present......I think its a job I'll be staying in Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 6, 2013 Report Share Posted August 6, 2013 LOL he was there, that's annoying enough with most boys ! As for for belly piercing, don't hold your breath, kirsty started at 13 as well, until at 15 she hit me with the big guns, " my body is my own and you always said no one can tell me what to do with it" my own words thrown in my face ! Having a smart kid sucks, she knows I was talking about child abuse NOT piercings. Oh just a thought, if she has got aspergers, ask for an IQ test, aspergers kids often have a high IQ so they need more school support. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 7, 2013 Report Share Posted August 7, 2013 So its feedback day tomorrow for Brookes ASD assessment.....God I feel sick and have horrendous butterflies, I can't see me getting much sleep tonight!! So what happened ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 8, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Well Im relieved to say she isn't on the spectrum.......however they believe she has a personality disorder, severe anxiety, seperation problems and her speech and language test shows she has a high IQ, but very poor abiliy to understand the spoken word causing her social difficulties. Together they said these different problems are causing Brookes behavioural problems and jealousy towards her little sister. The psychologist believes a lot of these issues are due to my difficult pregnancy and labour and because of her poor relationship with her dad she has become over dependant on me and very afraid of trusting other people. I was in the feedback appointment for 1 1/2 hours, it was very detailed and made sense. Now the next step is waiting for her report and recommendations and hope and pray camhs acknowledge the complexity of Brookes problems and agree to give her the further assessment and therapy which the psychologist feels Brooke needs to allow her to understand herself, her own emotions and how she can deal with issues appropriately without resorting to tantrums and violence.......my head really hurts and its been a very emotional few days I feel as though I still have a very big fight ahead to get the help and support required Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Well at least your moving in the right direction hun x You have loads of support here 24.7 don't forget that x x x Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stormy Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 As Sarah said you have loads of support here dont forget that we will help you out however we can and be great listeners x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 It will be a fight but I reckon your up to it. I'm not a therapist or qualified in any way, all I can offer is an ear, a shoulder, a glass of alkymahol next time your in london and a bit of common sense. Right now my common sense is telling me you need to take a small step back, there's nothing you can do until the reports are all in, nothing has changed, so take a breathe and do something fun. It doesn't matter what, go for a walk, the movies, spend the afternoon playing monopoly, retail therapy even (although with 2 daughter's I might avoid that lol) Oh just thought of something else I can offer, a 16 year old more than happy to teen accompany (NOT babysit !! ) for an hour Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 8, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Thanks guys, it means a lot to know you all care Your right Sarah I do need to step back, my batteries certainly need recharging as I feel exhausted. At the moment Im very upset with my hubbies latest comment of 'well she can stop pretending there is something wrong now we know she isn't autistic and she can start behaving' So on that note I'm sure you appreciate I'm not feeling very supported at the moment. My plan at the moment is to finish for my 2 weeks annual leave on Friday, then on Monday I'm taking myself and the 3 children to a caravan for 4 days to have fun, I'm leaving the hubby and dogs at home, I think we need the space. And then when the report comes through I will resume the battle ahead! It's a shame you're so far away from me Sarah, a good drink is probably what I need! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahjng Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Well with three kids I won't say have a couple while your away, you'll have to be content with coca cola lol. Your hubby sounds like a lot of people, if it can be labelled they're happy, because the common thought is autism is a medical/organic problem, as soon as the words behavioural problems come out, they think it's a slight on them, (read him !) And their (his) parenting, so when the report comes, make a photocopy before he sees it, then highlight all the bits that say it's NOT her fault, the pregnancy and labour for example, it might help him be a little more understanding if he can see in black and white, from a DOCTOR, that it's not just her being naughty, that this is something she can't help, but can be helped with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BingBlaze n Skyla Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 like sarah says , youve got us all here for u atleast tho it sounds like things are moving forward with you regarding it all hugs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goingsolo Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Glad the assessment was so thorough. Brooke has a lot to deal with but hopefully now will get the support to help. Don't forget you need support as well, here is a good start, ears and shoulders always at the ready. It is no ones 'fault' just as no one is 'normal' it just is . A big hug and enjoy your time at the caravan x. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chula Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 I'm so sorry your husband said that. I hope he didn't say that to her. If she is struggling with a mental illness of any kind, there is nothing that is more damaging than having it invalidated by the people who are supposed to love and protect you. You are doing a wonderful job of trying to find a solution that works for your daughter. Be her biggest advocate. Hugs to you and your girls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Val (Zebedee) Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Debs, I'm glad you & Brooke have got some answers & a road to go down now with what has been uncovered. I know we're a husky forum & can probably tell you anything & everything fur related about them but believe me when I say we are here for you as support. We might not always know what to do or say as we don't have that experience, but you have a 10,000 strong "family" here to do what we can while you & Brooke are getting through this. Have a fab holiday with the kids, you deserve some time out to spend with each other and I'd personally like to thank Sarahjng for her wise words on this, some of the replies have been enlightening for me who has very limited knowledge of this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mia-Blue Posted August 8, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 I can't thank you all enough for your very kind words, it means a lot more than you will ever know to be able to freely express myself on here......I don't feel able to rant on FB as my kiddies and family members will see and I don't want that. Val you're so right about some of the advice I have been offered, it really has helped me through the last few days. I really don't know what the future holds but I do know that with the support from this forum I will get through it Sarah I love the idea of highlighting the points, I am definitely going to do that not only for the hubby, but for school and the GP. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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