yamahar6wme Posted April 7, 2015 Report Share Posted April 7, 2015 Hey guys I know this is really of topic but thought maybe there is some of you guys that could help with advice. My son who is now 7 has been diagnosed with autism he was excluded from school for the first at the age of 4 just after a couple of months since he started year one that year was hell for me and I got that depressed that I almost gave him up to his dad we are not together I lost my job because of what was going on and just didn't want to be here. Finally when he was 5 he got seen by camms who deal with children and adults with mental health who said he was fine but we all knew other wise at this point I was at breaking point this was January by now he had been suspended 3 times this is a space of 5 months. I got to the point I had to call social services for help who to be honest were no help I broke down asking for support they gave me none they referred me to caffe who were brilliant to a point. This carried on for the rest of term them trying things that didn't no where near close to working my little boy who loved ppl turned into a hating child who starting hitting ppl and other kids. Then in following term the school finally referred him to a prew which is like a rehab he was there from October to about February and went back to his school he was fine for a month and kicked off again so he went back to the prew I begged the school to hold their hands up and say they couldn't cope and finally they did he was expelled on my request so he could be re-schooled at a special needs school which he started in feb this year and it's brilliant the dilemma I have now is I work part time so term time is fine how ever during school holidays I don't know what to do. I have to work or I would have no money I have no local childcare that I know of that specialise in children with his needs he has been kicked out of 2 nurseries who tried but couldn't cope. Is there any of you guys that have maybe gone through something similar thing or have a friend or family who have any ideas what I can try what support can I get physical or financial I don't have family that can help they all work. Thanks sorry for long explanation but thought I'd tell you from start. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emma Posted April 7, 2015 Report Share Posted April 7, 2015 I know that social services haven't helped you too much so far but it might be worth contacting them and asking about any local provisions able to accomodate or specialise in care for children on the ASD spectrum as they may be able to put you in touch with someone who can help. Also worth talking to are the carers at your son's school. There must be other people in the same boat and they may have some answers for you. Good luck. xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah Posted April 7, 2015 Report Share Posted April 7, 2015 Oh hun I know what you're going through as my parents went through the same thing with my brother. He has severe brain damage and was in special needs schools until 18 years old. You are his sole carer so you are entitled to financial help by way of a carers allowance as long as you spend at least 35 hrs per week caring for them which you do Autism is manageable however they need stability and him being passed from school to school won't have helped - that's the education system fault not yours! They should recognise things like this and i would also speak to your GP they can give you lots of avenues to go down. You can also get respite care for him too I worked for a couple of years during half term breaks at a day care centre specifically for children with autism, speak to your local council and see what facilities there are available to you. It's not easy and you have to fill in forms and stand your ground but there are things out there x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yamahar6wme Posted April 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 Thanks for the advice I have asked council twice in the past about childcare they just sent me normal nursery numbers he is a very smart loving boy when he is in a routine but as soon as that brakes he turns to a totally different child that I don't recognise and it hurts me. I knew since he was less then a year old something wasn't right but no-one would listen to me they said he just learning differently. I thought he was deaf until I got a ballon and popped it he wouldn't respond to anything even now you still have to say his name before speaking to him or he won't realise going out any where can be really hard and I get those looks from other parents when he changes to that other child it's horrible. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guinnessman Posted April 8, 2015 Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 My wife and I both work for MacIntyre Charity, my wife is a support worker who regularly works with adults with ASD. I recognise many of the challenges you face and one of the hardest things can be getting in to the 'system'. I work in IT, but have worked alongside many with Autism. Have you contacted the National Autistic Society? They offer a free helpline and can provide advice on assessment. There is a free phone number at the bottom of this page. http://www.autism.org.uk/working-with/health/information-for-general-practitioners/recognising-autism-spectrum-disorder.aspx Once in the system a personal support plan can be developed. The start of the process begins at local government, but support is often provided by outside providers like MacIntyre. The NAS should be able to help with this. Support is expensive, but 99% of our work is funded by local government. If it is OK with you, I'll share your story with our internal ASD focus group, they may be able to give some more information on next steps. There is a lot of support and opportunity available, once you overcome the challenge of accessing it. What part of the country are you in? Someone here may have contact details within your local council. Things will get better. http://www.macintyrecharity.org/our-services/children-young-people/no-limits/ NAS Helpline 0808 800 4104 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robke Posted April 8, 2015 Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 Nice one Phil...this is why I just love this place we are not just about the furkids but also the 2 legged kids.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guinnessman Posted April 8, 2015 Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 One last thing, if you have not read it, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time is a enjoyable read and a story of a boy with ASD and gives an insight in to how the world is seen through his eyes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NOBELHOWLUC49 Posted April 8, 2015 Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 Just having Children is difficult enough, but the problems you face must be so hard. I hope Phil's post helps and do read the book that Phil has suggested. it is heart warming and really opens your eyes. His other book is really good as well. All I can offer though is a Big . X Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moonstar Posted April 8, 2015 Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 whoever happens dont keep it to yourself he needs you healthy and the stress will build up and you will make yourself ill try to think of each small problem and takle in order of impotance cos the whole big thing is to much and dont be fobed of get help you both need it thinking of you we our here x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormchaser09 Posted April 8, 2015 Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 Hi, the advise about the autistic society should help. I know things are different up here in Scotland but our special needs schools generally have summer schools and some of our local childminders do work with autistic children. I work in a nursery and have had a few wee ones through with this condition. There is help out there but it is a nightmare to access but once it is in place things should improve. It is heartbreaking when people judge a childs behaviour without knowing their background. One of our 'Mum's 'had a terrible time with her son whenever she took him out but with help and a deeper understanding of how the childs mind works he is making great progress now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yamahar6wme Posted April 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted April 8, 2015 Just wanted to say thanks for all your supportive advise and words of kindness afcorse I don't mind you sharing Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goingsolo Posted April 12, 2015 Report Share Posted April 12, 2015 Ive been away so just catching up. First big hugs being a parent is tough before the problems and you're a good one who knows her boy xxx. 2nd does the school have a parent group? I know we do where I work other parents are great for information. Get respite for yourself and him with direct payments you can choose the carer, parents at our school write adverts for staff who ars interested in earning a bit more, we know the children and the parents value the expertise, the only condition the school apply is you dont work with the child in school, there may also be formally run over night respite care in your area, ask cahms and social services, you doctor (is hd under a consultant?) And the school. here to help and support xxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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