Mazz Posted August 31, 2015 Report Share Posted August 31, 2015 WOMEN'S REVENGE'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.As she fumbled for her wallet ,I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me,And I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'WIFE VS. HUSBANDA couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word..An earlier discussion had led to an argument and Neither of them wanted to concede their position..As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, The husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?' 'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'WORDSA husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day.30,000 to a man's 15,000.The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'CREATIONA man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid and sobeautiful all at the same time.'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !WHO DOES WHATA man and his wife were having an argument about who Should brew the coffee each morning.The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first,And then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it,because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee..'Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'So she fetched the Bible, and opened the Old Testament and showed him at the top ofseveral pages, that it indeed says . 'HEBREWS'The Silent TreatmentA man and his wife were having some problems at home And were giving each other the silenttreatment.Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him At 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece ofpaper,'Please wake me at 5:00 AM .' He left it where he knew she would find it.The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, When he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM . Wake up..' Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robke Posted August 31, 2015 Report Share Posted August 31, 2015 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted August 31, 2015 Report Share Posted August 31, 2015 The last one really made me LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emma Posted August 31, 2015 Report Share Posted August 31, 2015 Brilliant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.